Should You Consider a Prenup?

If you’re planning to get married, have you given any thought to whether or not you need a prenup?

More often than not, couples who are planning to get married spend lots of time and money making arrangements for their big day, but they rarely give any thought to how their financial position may look after they’ve tied the knot.

Why Discussing a Prenup Matters

Raising the idea of a prenuptial agreement while making plans for the happy day can be awkward and extremely unromantic. However, spending time thinking about and discussing these things before the big day can be invaluable.

It can also help to avoid any unpleasant conversations about how assets and finances will be managed in the hopefully unlikely event of separation or divorce. More and more couples are seeing prenups as a way to protect their financial positions should things take a turn for the worse in the future.

Other Types of Nuptial Agreements

There are a few other types of nuptial agreements that couples can consider having drawn up to protect themselves and their assets. Such as

• a post-nuptial agreement, which is used where a couple are already married,
• a separation agreement for married couples who are separating but not planning to divorce just yet, or
• a living together or cohabitation agreement for a couple who are planning to live together rather than get married.

The Traditional Approach to Nuptial Agreements

Traditionally, when a couple decides to have one of these types of agreements drawn up, each of them would engage their own lawyer to deal with the negotiations in preparation of their agreement. This would involve the couple’s lawyers exchanging emails and letters back and forth between themselves and the couple, making phone calls, and arranging meetings.

All of this work obviously takes time. These communications can, and often do, lead to unnecessary friction between the couple and inevitably the work necessary to progress matters. Using this route can lead to delays, excessive and unnecessary costs.

A Better Alternative: The Collaborative Practice Route

But there’s an alternative to the traditional route: the collaborative practice route. Any of the agreements I’ve mentioned can be done using the collaborative practice route.

What is Collaborative Practice?

Well, it’s a form of dispute resolution where a couple works together with the help of lawyers who are specialised in dealing with the collaborative process. The process involves the couple and their respective lawyers all meeting up together to discuss and negotiate in an open, honest, and transparent way what they want to achieve and how they want this recorded in their agreement.

How Four-Way Meetings Save Time and Reduce Stress

These meetings, known as four-way meetings, save time, are more cost-effective, and are less stressful—all of which are extremely important at such a special time in the couple’s life. Everyone is present in the same room at the same time, and the couple are encouraged to discuss their needs and interests, as well as those of any relevant children.

This openness helps the couple understand each other’s needs and interests and what is being proposed. Additionally, with everyone present, any issues or concerns that may arise can be resolved quickly and effectively with the lawyers present and working together to advise on legal issues, provide options, and ensure that the couple remains in charge of the process.

The Role of Neutral Professionals

In certain situations, the involvement of other professionals, known as neutrals, may be helpful. For instance, there may be a need to involve counsellors, mediators, family therapists, financial advisers, and even translators. These neutrals may be able to assist the couple in the process where expert advice or guidance on things like pensions, mortgages, tax planning, will preparation, or even couples therapy may be needed.

The Importance of Private Meetings with Lawyers

The couple will also have the opportunity to meet with their own lawyers separately before any of the four-way meetings. This will give them the chance to discuss any particular points they may want to explore at the next four-way meeting.

In this process, everything is done through two- and four-way meetings. Correspondence, unless it’s to arrange meetings, is wholeheartedly discouraged. The lawyers will discuss with the couple the legal position of these types of agreements in the UK, together with the pros and cons of signing up to such an agreement.

Why Choose a Collaborative Lawyer?

Choosing to work with a collaborative lawyer will help ensure that the couple are treated fairly, that there is openness and honesty, and that their agreement reflects what they both want to achieve.

Strengthening Relationships Through Collaboration

Finally, and most importantly, using this process for these types of agreements can often improve and strengthen a couple’s relationship. What better way to start your journey together?

About Me and the Collaborative Family Solutions Group

My name is Lin Cumberlin, and I’m a collaboratively trained lawyer and a member of the Collaborative Family Solutions Group.

Our group, known as a POD, consists of 15 collaboratively trained lawyers based in Salisbury, Andover, Romsey, Winchester, and Shaftesbury. We also have four financial advisors, three mediators, a family therapist, a life coach, and a divorce coach.

Find out more about our members.